Joe-Mantegna Movie Reviews


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VHS movie reviews for "Joe-Mantegna" sorted by average review score:

Albino Alligator
Released in VHS Tape by Miramax Home Entertainment (04 February, 2003)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Kevin Spacey
Starring: Matt Dillon, Faye Dunaway, and Gary Sinise
Actor Kevin Spacey made his directorial debut in this uneven crime thriller that has the claustrophobic feel of a play. Matt Dillon, Gary Sinise, and William Fichtner play a trio of robbers who have just pulled a job gone wrong. On the run from the cops, they hide out in a basement bar, where they try to figure out their next move. There's a certain amount of urgency, however, because Sinise, the brains of the outfit, is badly wounded--which means that Fichtner, the group psycho, is allowed to run wild, terrorizing the barflies unlucky enough to be their hostages. As the cops swarm outside the bar--thinking these three are major criminals rather than small potatoes--tensions mount, mostly through misunderstanding. But it's all a lot of talk, not nearly enough of it interesting, that pushes the movie slowly to its inevitable conclusion. --Marshall Fine
Average review score:

A Mixed Bag
Director Kevin Spacey leads a superb cast who do reasonably well considering the material. Don't get me wrong, the film's idea is a good one. But this script seems more suitable as a play, than a film. Being that most of the film takes place in a one room bar. Faye Dunaway is great, as well as Gary Sinise in a subdued role. But Matt Dillion's tough guy routine seems a little forced, and by the end of the film it's a little tired. However, this is suitable start as Spacey's debut. It's enjoyable too watch, especially if you let yourself sink into it, and try not too deconstruct it's flaws.

Strong debuts from Kevin Spacey and Christian Forte
Strong, strong debuts from Kevin Spacey as director and Christian Forte as writer. Strong cast, except for Faye Dunaway, who is apparently still channeling Joan Crawford, or maybe Bette Davis. Sinise is a winner, as is Dillon. Nice to see M. Emmett Walsh still getting quality work. Has its share of "first-time director" problems, including a number of really awkward transitions and jump cuts right in the middle of the second act, but Spacey is a directing talent to watch for in the future. Too bad Forte didn't follow-up such a muscular debut with something equally well-crafted.

Great cast,great director can only mean great film right?
It was always obvious that Kevin Spacey would only ever assemble a first rate cast for his first movie as director, and he was as discerning with his choice of script as director as he is with his acting jobs. This movie plays like a play and tellingly the best performances come from the stage actors. Gary Sinise delivers a controlled performance that demonstrates the humanity of his character, while William Fichtner manages to carry the bulk of the humour and the horror without going over the top. The script and Spacey's direction keep the tension high despite being confined to one room for much of the movie (think 12 Angry Men - Spacey actually consulted Sidney Lumet for advice).

Where the film falls down is in the weak performances of two of the most important characters, played by Matt Dillon and Faye Dunaway. Both performances are one-dimensional and affected (and Dunaway has the complexion of a Barbie doll - plastic). The rest of the cast has little to do but make the most of what they have (especially M. Emmett Walsh).

See this movie. There are a lot of worse and more successful movies out there than this one. Quality's very rare these days. So make the most of it.


Queens Logic
Released in VHS Tape by Artisan Entertainment (09 May, 1995)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Steve Rash
Starring: Kevin Bacon, Linda Fiorentino, and John Malkovich
Average review score:

Queens Logic: I'm Moving Out
As a lifetime resident of the neighborhood depicted in the movie(which is Astoria, where NOBODY says they're from "Queens"), I excitedly anticipated renting and viewing this movie. Unfortunately, the high points consisted mainly of spotting neighborhood sites and scenes, unless you also include laughing at the incredibly lame situations and dialogue. The high point of lameness (among many) is the speech by Chloe Webb, in which she explains how she's just a girl from Queens and "will always be from Queens". The accent selected for this speech is unidentifiable, and may contain some part Bowery Boys and some part Nanny, but has never been heard inside the city limits of Astoria (or Queens for that matter). Her boyfriend, Ken Olin, is going through the struggle (as all artists must) in which he must decide if this ordinary girl from Queens with the odd accent can be his "muse", or will he need to find a muse in Manhattan. Luckily, the N train is near, so the decision can be made conveniently. Elsewhere in the convoluted plot, Joe Mantegna inexpicably climbs the Hellgate Bridge with a toothpick in his mouth,and prefers to hang out in bars rather than with his extreme babe wife, Linda Fiorentino. The main saving graces for the movie are John Malkovich playing a lovable, friendly but somehow menacingly Malkovich gay guy, Fiorentino just for showing up, and the general attitude that Astorians are cool while Manhattanites are idiotic. (This is clearly true, but why base a movie on it?) Note that Malkovich and Kevin Bacon (also appearing) never ever discuss being in this movie. PS: Watch out for the howling scene-I give you four slices of Astoria pizza for free if you can watch it without cringing and running out of your living room. Oh yes, Jamie Lee Curtis plays a ditzy crazy lady- never seen that before!

Not even Tom...
I originally bout this for Tom Waits, but he's hardly in it.
And John Malckovich as 'the gay friend'.
Don't bother with this one

Underappreciated gem.
If you know a group of 30 (and even 40) somethings who just can't seem to let go of their adolescence, this film will resonate with you. The buddy relationships depicted amongst the pack of guys are right on target, and the awkwardness between the guys' reliance on the pack and their building adult romantic relationship (heterosexual or gay)beyond the pack is well detailed. Linda Fiorentino and Chloe Webb are a credible and recognizeable pair of friends who suport each other, sometimes in anger, somtimes in bemusement, while the somewhat arrested guys in their lives stumble into growing up. Others may disagree, but I am willing to bet that many single urbanites will shout "bingo" when they overhear some of the film's conversations between guy and girl, guy and guy, and girl and girl. Add some quirky, fun NYC caricatures, an evening of last hurrah stunts, and first rate performances from everyone (particularly Mantegna, Jamie Lee Curtis, Fiorentino, and Malkevich)and you have a solid, enjoyable ensemble piece.


Queens Logic
Released in VHS Tape by Avid Home Entertainment (26 March, 2002)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Steve Rash
Starring: Kevin Bacon, Linda Fiorentino, and John Malkovich
Average review score:

Queens Logic: I'm Moving Out
As a lifetime resident of the neighborhood depicted in the movie(which is Astoria, where NOBODY says they're from "Queens"), I excitedly anticipated renting and viewing this movie. Unfortunately, the high points consisted mainly of spotting neighborhood sites and scenes, unless you also include laughing at the incredibly lame situations and dialogue. The high point of lameness (among many) is the speech by Chloe Webb, in which she explains how she's just a girl from Queens and "will always be from Queens". The accent selected for this speech is unidentifiable, and may contain some part Bowery Boys and some part Nanny, but has never been heard inside the city limits of Astoria (or Queens for that matter). Her boyfriend, Ken Olin, is going through the struggle (as all artists must) in which he must decide if this ordinary girl from Queens with the odd accent can be his "muse", or will he need to find a muse in Manhattan. Luckily, the N train is near, so the decision can be made conveniently. Elsewhere in the convoluted plot, Joe Mantegna inexpicably climbs the Hellgate Bridge with a toothpick in his mouth,and prefers to hang out in bars rather than with his extreme babe wife, Linda Fiorentino. The main saving graces for the movie are John Malkovich playing a lovable, friendly but somehow menacingly Malkovich gay guy, Fiorentino just for showing up, and the general attitude that Astorians are cool while Manhattanites are idiotic. (This is clearly true, but why base a movie on it?) Note that Malkovich and Kevin Bacon (also appearing) never ever discuss being in this movie. PS: Watch out for the howling scene-I give you four slices of Astoria pizza for free if you can watch it without cringing and running out of your living room. Oh yes, Jamie Lee Curtis plays a ditzy crazy lady- never seen that before!

Not even Tom...
I originally bout this for Tom Waits, but he's hardly in it.
And John Malckovich as 'the gay friend'.
Don't bother with this one

Underappreciated gem.
If you know a group of 30 (and even 40) somethings who just can't seem to let go of their adolescence, this film will resonate with you. The buddy relationships depicted amongst the pack of guys are right on target, and the awkwardness between the guys' reliance on the pack and their building adult romantic relationship (heterosexual or gay)beyond the pack is well detailed. Linda Fiorentino and Chloe Webb are a credible and recognizeable pair of friends who suport each other, sometimes in anger, somtimes in bemusement, while the somewhat arrested guys in their lives stumble into growing up. Others may disagree, but I am willing to bet that many single urbanites will shout "bingo" when they overhear some of the film's conversations between guy and girl, guy and guy, and girl and girl. Add some quirky, fun NYC caricatures, an evening of last hurrah stunts, and first rate performances from everyone (particularly Mantegna, Jamie Lee Curtis, Fiorentino, and Malkevich)and you have a solid, enjoyable ensemble piece.


Turbulence 3 - Heavy Metal
Released in VHS Tape by Lions Gate Home Ente (10 July, 2001)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Jorge Montesi
Average review score:

"Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal"
This is one of the worst films ever made! And I mean it!! One of the worst scripts I have ever come across. The acting is hammy and the direction is very weak! There was no reason for this movie to exist! "Turbulence" was a good movie and they should of stopped at that but two sequels! No way! If you like the 1st mabye try "Turbulence 2: Fear of Flying" but stay away of the 3rd. This is one terrible movie! Believe ME!!

Not bad...for a third installment
The movie is surprisingly okay. I liked the idea of this "Marilyn Manson" type character playing one of the heroes of the film who at first is against God in his music but eventually sees the light and embraces God towards the end. The only thing I didn't care for in this movie is the actor Craig Sheffer and why his character is supposed to be one of the heroes for the film...AGAIN. I say again because he is also in the first sequel to the Turbulence series yet he's playing a different character and I guess we're just supposed to forget that the actor was in the second film playing the hero? The sad thing is I didn't even like either of his characters...but the films are alright.

Turbulance 3: Heavy Metal
NOT THAT BAD!! I have seen worse than this. Yes, plot is weak, but John Mann (Slade Craven/Simon Flanders) plays dual roles just fine. Probably should have had more "music sets" than the one to make it better. Recommended seeing for the fun.


Turbulence 3:Heavy Metal
Released in VHS Tape by Lions Gate Home Ente (10 July, 2001)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Jorge Montesi
Average review score:

"Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal"
This is one of the worst films ever made! And I mean it!! One of the worst scripts I have ever come across. The acting is hammy and the direction is very weak! There was no reason for this movie to exist! "Turbulence" was a good movie and they should of stopped at that but two sequels! No way! If you like the 1st mabye try "Turbulence 2: Fear of Flying" but stay away of the 3rd. This is one terrible movie! Believe ME!!

Not bad...for a third installment
The movie is surprisingly okay. I liked the idea of this "Marilyn Manson" type character playing one of the heroes of the film who at first is against God in his music but eventually sees the light and embraces God towards the end. The only thing I didn't care for in this movie is the actor Craig Sheffer and why his character is supposed to be one of the heroes for the film...AGAIN. I say again because he is also in the first sequel to the Turbulence series yet he's playing a different character and I guess we're just supposed to forget that the actor was in the second film playing the hero? The sad thing is I didn't even like either of his characters...but the films are alright.

Turbulance 3: Heavy Metal
NOT THAT BAD!! I have seen worse than this. Yes, plot is weak, but John Mann (Slade Craven/Simon Flanders) plays dual roles just fine. Probably should have had more "music sets" than the one to make it better. Recommended seeing for the fun.


The Last Don II
Released in VHS Tape by Lions Gate Home Ente (10 December, 2002)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Graeme Clifford
Average review score:

Slightly less entertaining than root canal surgery
Anyone rating this movie more than one star needs to have their head examined. Mario Puzo is turning over in his grave, having his name associated with this "movie". There is a good possibility that the screenplay was written by the 4-year-old autistic girl Bethany. The terms "plot", "transition" and "cohesion" are clearly not in the writer's vocabulary. 127 minutes of my life that I will never be able to get back.

the last don II
i think the last don II was a good movie about the mob. i think it would be good for part III was made so people like me can enjoy watching.

This DVD is excellent
For those who have seen The Last Don or the Godfather they will not be disapointed with his latest creation The Last Don 2 it has all the earmarking's of a Mario Puzo story with great performances by Jason Gedrick and Kristie Alley. The movie centers around the Clericuzio family and in this sequel to the Last Don Cross Jason Gedrick's character is brought back this time to be the driving force behind the family and It's saviour. The Last Don 2 as in the first movie has some interesting parallels to Hollywood and Mob life suggesting that they are similar worlds. Although I strongly reccomend this movie I believe to fully enjoy it you must see the first of this series The Last Don. And if your A Mario Puzo fan you wont be sorry for watching this Movie.


The Last Don II (complete miniseries)
Released in VHS Tape by Vidmark/Trimark (10 December, 2002)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Graeme Clifford
Average review score:

Slightly less entertaining than root canal surgery
Anyone rating this movie more than one star needs to have their head examined. Mario Puzo is turning over in his grave, having his name associated with this "movie". There is a good possibility that the screenplay was written by the 4-year-old autistic girl Bethany. The terms "plot", "transition" and "cohesion" are clearly not in the writer's vocabulary. 127 minutes of my life that I will never be able to get back.

the last don II
i think the last don II was a good movie about the mob. i think it would be good for part III was made so people like me can enjoy watching.

Fine entertainment--not quite up to Part 1
I really enjoyed "The Last Don" (Part 1). Although it wasn't quite the masterpiece that "The Godfather" was, I thought it was more true-to-life than the great classic. "The Last Don" saga deals with the modern mafia, and the efforts of the head of the Clericuzio family to extricate his family from crime, and enter the legitimate world with his empire's wealth intact.

Part 2 picks up exactly where Part 1 ends. In my opinion Part 2 is quite watchable, and constitutes good entertainment. It is not quite up to Part 1. Certain segments of it seem over-acted and perhaps overly simplistic--it lacked the twists and surprises that made Part 1 such a delight. Most of the time I felt that I knew exactly where Part 2 was taking us.

Notwithstanding my criticisms, this is a very entertaining sequel. Its portrayal of Hollywood is very funny, and there are certain components of the film that I frankly am surprised did not get someone sued. Spoiler omitted here, but if you watch Part 2 you will most surely know exactly what I mean.

I enjoyed it.


My Little Assassin
Released in VHS Tape by Xenon Entertainment (27 March, 2001)
MPAA Rating: NR (Not Rated)
Director: Jack Bender
Average review score:

Based on a true story.
The movie begins with the caption "Based on a true story". However, it is very difficult to figure out which parts are true and which parts are fiction.

Here is a brief synopsis of this movie. The movie takes place in post revolution Cuba, at a time when Americans are allowed to enter Havana, the Casinos are fully operational, and the Cuban army is infiltrated with a few CIA agents. Anwar is the 19 years old daughter of a divorced couple,lives with her father who is the captain of a Cruise ship. Her mother is a CIA agent. The cruise ship comes to Cuba, and Castro wants to visit the ship because he's never seen anyhting so big. The daughter of the captain allows them to visit the ship once Castro(Mantegna) and his entourage disarm themselves. Within a few hours they fall in love and kiss on the deck. Anwar returns back to the US, and one day when she is home alone Castro's advisor stops by and tells her that there is a private jet waiting for her. She takes off and flies to Cuba to be with Castro, eventually she gets pregnant, and during the last few days of her pregnancy she faints and wakes up in the US and "unpregnant" accompanied by her mother and FBI agents. FBI an CIA agents convice her that Castro had the pregnancy terminated, and killed the unborn baby.

With vengeance in her heart, she joins a boot camp to receive training as a killer. She flies to Cuba with intentions of posioning Castro. However, the poison pills melts in her make-up bag, Castro understands what she is trying to do, and gives her his side arm, and calls her "My Little Assasin". But she is unable to kill him and returns back to the US, where she gets a slap on her face for not being able to complete the mission.

Eventually she finds out that her son is alive and is a medical student in Cuba. She buys a Levis Jean and goes to Cuba to see Castro and her son.

The movie portrays US government as the evil empire and Castro as the good guy. I guess you have to watch it on your own to find out which parts of this story are based on truth. Good Luck, your sentence will be about 90 minutes.

Thought-provoking "coming-of-age" movie
Although the emphasis is on Marita Lorenz and Fidel Castro, their ill-fated affair, and the implementation of "la revolución", this movie is a well-written example of interwoven sub-plots of "event" and "character study". The script-writer has artfully woven together the historical backdrop of Cuba from the very early days of Castro's revolution, U.S. involvement on the island (reflective also of CIA activities in other parts of Latin America), glimpses into the various American anti-Castro activities, the tragic naïvité of a teenager rather uninstructed by both of her professionally very busy parents in the art of sound judgment, the dangers of lacking one's own cohesive belief system, the ease of falling prey to the cult of personality, and the painful process of coming of age in a harsh and complex world.

Marita's journey begins as a naïve 19-year-old idealistic dreamer. When she meets Fidel Castro, she has never thought through the concepts of rule of law, peaceful transitions of government, economic justice as opposed to systematized revenge, or true reform versus manipulative takeover in pursuit of totalitarian self-interest. She _wants to_ believe his promises of loosening the grip of terror "when Cuba is fixed..." but becomes gradually disillusioned with the capricious arrests and brutal removals of residents from their Havana homes on no grounds other than rumored suspicion of anti-Castro sentiments. Her inner struggle between her attraction to him, her hopeful wish that in time conditions might indeed improve on the island she has come to love, her own initially immature understanding of freedom and allegiance to one's country, and her painful growth toward coming to understand the components of true liberty are skilfully interwoven and portrayed with sensitivity.

Her inner journey is paced slowly enough to take the viewer into the mind of a young, hopeful, romantic idealist who gradually comes to see through the hypocrisy of endless promises -- her journey also provides a symbolic walk through the gradual disillusionment throughout the island with those same promises that never come to fruition.

Filmed in part in beautiful Old Havana and interspersed with hauntingly lyrical Cuban music -- even someone unfamiliar with Cuba would be touched by the beauty of the place and perhaps gain a sense of why (despite the tragic results of the revolution) Marita had such a lasting affection for the island, her Cuba Linda...

which part is fiction ?
what the movie portrays is shadow function of the US Govt. The best scene in the movie is when Castro offers his own gun to his 'little assassin'.

In the end, can't resist the temptation to know further, whether her son is really alive and became a doctor.


For Better or Worse
Released in VHS Tape by Castle Rock (18 May, 1999)
MPAA Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Director: Jason Alexander
Average review score:

A Motion Picture Travesty!
To say that I disliked "For Better Or Worse" would be an understatement...a very large one. Perhaps it takes quite a talent to make a comedy this awful. Personally, I think everyone involved with this film should be ashamed.

The worst offender in this movie would have to be Jason Alexander. Not only is he the main character but he directed this flop as well. It is painfully obvious that in nine years of "Seinfeld" he probably never once contributed any material to the show. He evidently doesn't have a clue as to what is actually funny.

Alexander plays a perpetual loser named Michael Makeshift. One day, his scummy brother Reggie (James Woods) shows up on Michael's doorstep with his new bride Valerie (Lolita Davidovich). She's unconscious. Reggie asks his brother to look after her for a couple of days and then leaves. It turns out that Reggie has to meet up with a couple of goons, played by Jay Mohr and Joe Mantegna, in order to develop plans to rob a credit union. Great lengths are taken to try and squeeze humor out of the fact that they are robbing a credit union instead of a bank. Why this would be even remotely funny to begin with is absolutely beyond me.

This all culminates in one of the most horrendous bank robbery scenes ever put on film. The soundtrack to this movie only makes things worse...if that's possible. It was so unbearable that I would rather listen to nails on a chalkboard.

Even if you are a die hard Jason Alexander fan, you will be much better off watching a thousand episodes of "Seinfeld" instead of watching this movie even once.

this movie rules!
This move rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Body and Soul
Released in VHS Tape by Mgm/Ua Studios (10 July, 2001)
MPAA Rating: R (Restricted)
Director: Sam Henry Kass
Average review score:

Cool Movie
We were walking through a casino in Reno when we were approached and asked if we wanted to be extras in a movie. So we sat around a bar in borrowed clothes while Jennifer Beals served us make-believe drinks. We actually got to watch her sigh. Very deep movie. It was an experience.


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